Don't fool yourself!

You know, the hardest person to fool is yourself.

Can I give an example?

Not too long ago, I quit faceboook. But you must hear how I got here. On my iTouch, I tried various ways to hide the facebook app from my view. I put it in the most obscured app folder I could find. But yet again, itouch provided a thing called "search" option where you just slide to the very first page on the home-page and just type what you're looking for. For a while, eventhough I don't know where my facebook app is, i still look at facebook almost every 5 minutes. itouch even puts it as my top search - sometimes I don't even have to type facebook anymore, it already suggest that I'll search that!!!

I tried, you know I really did. I tried to lessen the frequency of my facebook use, but none of it was any use.

Then I asked myself "why is it so haaaaaarddd to stop playing and checking facebook?"

Not too long ago, I heard an excellent sermon by Mark Driscoll, the title is "Ministry Idolatry", and there he said one line that hits me: "what is the first thing you look for when you're stressed, or in any need (bored etc.) that is your idol"

I heard that sermon many times before - but it never hits me that it includes the little things that i turn to when I have spare time, when I'm tired, when I'm feeling just a bit down. Things like tv, ice cream, comfort food/things.

You know what- facebook exceeded all of that - I don't just turn to facebook when I'm bored, or sad, or happy. I look at facebook whenever I have any spare time (many times , when i don't have time too). IT was really bad!

Then I decided to do a project on myself with God's help I'm challenging this idol of mine. MY challenge is to this idol: "I can live without you - so why should i worship you?" so back to the 1990s i go.

There are many other idols that kept on popping up in my heart wanting to take opportunities to make me worship them and dependent upon them. But I want to challenge them all - with the same statement.

The only reason why I am able to do this is because of 1 - I've found the true object of worship that I should really worship. He had shown me that even without all the other idols, He is still able and will help me through the end. I can't live without Him. He has been so faithful and real to me - how can I reject Him or even put Him in second place?

I'm reminded of the words of the martyr Polycarp , when he was forced to renounce Jesus or be burnt at the stake, he said "Eighty and six years I have served Christ and He has done me nothing but good; how then could I curse Him, my Lord and Savior?" He was burned alive.

How can I possibly curse Him by my action in trusting in feeble idols? I cannot.

In saying that, the worst thing I can fool myself in - is in terms of trusting myself to trust God. Trusting that I can by my own saviour and save myself. by nature, I have no desire to worship God or obey Him at all (Rm 3:36). NONE. Only HE can save me from giving up.and I praise Him for challenging me and keeping my accountable to Him each and everyday - giving me the strength and passion to do so without fail every morning. Because if it was up to me - i would've given up by now.

Thank you LORD!